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InfinitusEquitas

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Your right it does Break down to Our Own Perspective on "How we are Here"

Even if you Believe we Evolved tho, I think we Can agree that the ""Ideal"" situation would be best for our Mental Wellbeing and Psychical Heath If we Had a life long partner that are working as a Team with us and the Man Respects the womans thoughts and Ideas and he showed her love and support and The Woman can have a deep respect for her loving husband and both are working together as a team, a True Friendship.

This World Focuses people to really just worry about them Selfs and that Really Makes the Above statement Very Hard to Accomplish. People are basically trained today to have a Lust for Each other not Really Knowing Each other and when it gets hard because of anything to Leave Etc.

Most people live together and really don't know Each other That well.
A: Do you know and Agree if you want to or Not have kids Ever?
B: Can You have a in Depth Conversation you both disagree about and not get Mad at Each other?
C: Are You Both Truly Committed to Each other?
D: Do You Fully Trust Each other?
E: Do you share the Same Life priorities? Your Relationship should be important to both of you, Do you allow your Job or other Family to become more important to you than your mate?
F: Do you Share the Same Concept of How to Treat and Use Money??
G: Do you Think "Oh thats Annoying but I'll Change that about them" (More a Woman issue than a Man)
H: Can you Talk about issue G: and Not Get Mad at each other?
I: When you Argue do you Degrade your Partner or are you up-building?
J: Are you Trying to Stay Attracted to your Mate or do you or they "Look" at Other People??
K: BIG ONE "Is Your Partner Your Best Friend?
L: Do you Guys Like or at least Except the Same Type of Pets or are willing to not let it bother you??
M: Do you Except each others Hobbies??
N: Do You Know & Except Each Others Spirituality? And How you would raise Your Kids (If your having them)
Well that's the problem. I complete agree that everything you listed is very important and if taken into consideration it would help a relationship.

Going over that list made me think of a friend who uses the website OkCupid. On there you can answer a ton of user create questions and list what you would want to your partner to answer, and how important that question/answer is to you.

Good idea. Problem is people don't know wtf they want. Also they lie and they hide or don't answer questions they don't want to if they think the answer shows anything negative.

Out of curiosity on a caffeine fueled night of insomnia I went through over 1000 questions and 50+ tests.... honestly. End result Tons of 70-90% matches very few over 90%.

Problem is most people don't don't even look at matches that are under 80%. Which I think is ridiculous. Than there is the other problem.... without even looking at the qualitative results most matches are discarded automatically because of looks. I've seen this time and again... unemployed guy with no prospects gets messages all the time, another guy with good job, good prospects etc... no messages.

Big BIG problem is we place so much emphasis on instant attraction and instant gratification, instead of looking at things long term. Unfortunately I'm as guilty of this as anyone :(


Edit: Pretty much the first advice given by sex therapists to couples who don't find each other attractive anymore is turn off the lights. With constant information flow we have basically prioritizes the sense of sight over everything else, and this produces problems because the idea of beauty is to a degree very flexible and changes over time. Over the past 40 or so years the ideal image has shifted drastically for both men and women and as a result most men and women find themselves left out. No idea how this can be fixed though :(
 
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JaiNobeZ

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(I'm doing a total Devil's Advocate here, but it's fun)

No Krogith. You're going to so violently disagree. But no. An ideal scenario is one in which everyone is accepting of contraception and all relationships are open and sex is an activity purely for fun, not an activity binding a couple.

Relationships would then need to be formed on something meaningful rather than lust. There would be no jealousy at physical infidelity and everyone would be far more carefree. People would then come off the contraception when attempting to have a child, and during that time they would only engage in sex with their partner. Once pregnant, once more it wouldn't matter (until they were so heavily pregnant that they couldn't manage it).

Why don't we do it? The idea makes people gag. :D
 

JaiNobeZ

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I edited out a bit, but didn't change wording, kind of killing your own point there;)

Based on your argument women should find lasers to be attractive. Trust me... with a few exceptions.. they don't :(

I've also had the experience of the eyes glazing over. I start talking about something in detail, and I can practically chart the interest level going down. Of course when I see that I usually order another round of drinks and switch topics.
...Hmmm... yeah, that did occur to me. My guess would be that women (while possessing the ability to) don't want to waste the potential for the higher cognitive ability on something which does not serve a direct functional purpose.
 

Krogith

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In a World with a Culture of Self Centered People I do not see the mass of mankind Applying whats needed, something Drastic would have to Change Everything. Until then Mankind will Do what they Feel Like Rather than whats best long Term.


@JaiNobeZ I think your Theory Has already been done in mankind's history, With such a Strong Physiological Reaction to Sex I do not think You can just make it so "Atomistic" and Detach it from the even Chemical reaction we have in our brains. Men wouldn't suffer so much because honestly "Most" don't think about it (it's True) But Women I think will always have a issue and would never be able to fully separate them selfs.
 
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InfinitusEquitas

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(I'm doing a total Devil's Advocate here, but it's fun)

No Krogith. You're going to so violently disagree. But no. An ideal scenario is one in which everyone is accepting of contraception and all relationships are open and sex is an activity purely for fun, not an activity binding a couple.

Relationships would then need to be formed on something meaningful rather than lust. There would be no jealousy at physical infidelity and everyone would be far more carefree. People would then come off the contraception when attempting to have a child, and during that time they would only engage in sex with their partner. Once pregnant, once more it wouldn't matter (until they were so heavily pregnant that they couldn't manage it).

Why don't we do it? The idea makes people gag. :D
Actually I know a few people like that. I'm not one of them, and really can't understand "swingers" but aside from having sex with anything that moves:confused: they are nice people. It was super weird when the wife grabbed by oblong object though;) that's where I stopped it though. Just too weird for me.
 

InfinitusEquitas

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...Hmmm... yeah, that did occur to me. My guess would be that women (while possessing the ability to) don't want to waste the potential for the higher cognitive ability on something which does not serve a direct functional purpose.
Still doesn't make sense to me. I mean the abilities/hobbies that women find weird/strange, and off putting are actually those that can be super functional. The knowledge and understanding of something like lasers should be a plus, not a minus.

In an emergency I'm probably one of the very best people to have around due to being a bit of a paranoid survivalist, but all other other times having a knife a flashlight, a pen, and a lighter is just "strange" or "weird". I had a girl go through my left pocked where I have keys, knife, flashlight, tactical pen... and while she did find what she was looking for (next to my pocket;)) she also was put off by me having all kind of stuff in my pockets.
 

JaiNobeZ

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Haha! "Man pockets" is a phrase i'm quite fond of. I have keys, wallet (both also chained to my belt loops), fingerless gloves, lighter (sometimes a zippo and a torch-burner, and occasionally more), laser (although generally more than one, i sometimes have one around my neck and another in my pocket and if carrying a lot i take my bag), phone, possibly a little plastic bag full of some pyrotechnic compound and\or a screwdriver. I used to keep a round of blasting caps and a rubber band (no connection between them) in a hidden inside-pocket on my blazer and as i kid for a while i kept a single firecracker and a rigged disposable lighter on my inside hidden coat pocket.

If i'm going out anywhere exciting i carry a backpack with a bottle of water, extra layer, pencil & sharpener. Me & my dad often have competitions to see who has the most awesome stuff in their pockets.

Not something women can understand ;)
 

InfinitusEquitas

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Nice. My EDC pocket carry: Keychain with Leatherman Squit multi tool, 1.5" knife, nail clippers, and aside from other keys, handcuff key. My wallet contains steel card which supposedly has 10+ uses, but really works well for a bottle opener. I also carry two 3" knives, one tactical one general use, a cree multi mode 300lumen flashlight, tactical pen, and a lighter, and over past 6 months or so at least one laser pointer. Phone is on a belt holster.

Same as you I tend to expand what I carry when going somewhere interesting. When I used to smoke I also carried a portable hand torch:D

Really women just never got that, but the look their faces when they asked for a light... as one of my friends put it at the time, asking me for a lighter is like asking crocdile dundee for a knife:D
 

Krogith

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The Above concept isn't right because Women have purses with like 10X's what we have in our Pockets...

LOl and They also Share what is in each others...
 
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InfinitusEquitas

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I keep my 405 in my "handbag" >.>
When's the last time a guy went rummaging around in your handbag though;) One girl yelled at me, she jumped on my lap... rather unexpectedly... and my tactical pen poked her, we were all :friend::drunk: so it was :crackup:
 
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When's the last time a guy went rummaging around in your handbag though;) One girl yelled at me, she jumped on my lap... rather unexpectedly... and my tactical pen poked her, we were all :friend::drunk: so it was :crackup:
Jai does all the time.
Apart from that, no one else really.
 

JaiNobeZ

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^^ I'm going steal that Idea and make a thread on that, would be funny^^
There was already a thread about whether you carry a laser with you all the time. But yeah, that thread sounds fun. It looks funny when i empty my pockets onto a table or something.

Nice. My EDC pocket carry: Keychain with Leatherman Squit multi tool, 1.5" knife, nail clippers, and aside from other keys, handcuff key. My wallet contains steel card which supposedly has 10+ uses, but really works well for a bottle opener. I also carry two 3" knives, one tactical one general use, a cree multi mode 300lumen flashlight, tactical pen, and a lighter, and over past 6 months or so at least one laser pointer. Phone is on a belt holster.

Same as you I tend to expand what I carry when going somewhere interesting. When I used to smoke I also carried a portable hand torch:D

Really women just never got that, but the look their faces when they asked for a light... as one of my friends put it at the time, asking me for a lighter is like asking crocdile dundee for a knife:D
I have in my wallet my oyster card (gives us British kids free travel on buses) along with money. I wouldn't dare carry a knife because there's a 4 year sentence here if you're caught carrying one without a good reason and, while i think there is a minimum size for that rule applying, there's a big scare on at the moment about teenagers with knives so if i got stop-searched they would definitely take the knife and i'd probably end up in a police station for a while. I used to have my phone on a belt holster, but the clip came off. Been meaning to fix it or buy a new one actually... i was quite fond of it.

And, i don't smoke either. I just love fire. Not something i can explain... haha. Although one time some stranger asked me for a lighter and, upon seeing the bright blue flame of the slightly rigged torch-burner, ran off with it. I never saw him again :(. I got one that was identical shortly afterward, but anyway. I don't hand my lighters to strangers anymore.

And i missed an item off the list, my inhaler. Not too exciting.

@Jai

Dude, explore her pants pockets instead!!! A LOT MORE FUN!:crackup::crackup::crackup:
Chez doesn't really wear pants (or "trousers" as we tend to call them - for us "pants" means underwear :crackup) she always wears skirts. They do have pockets but as far as i'm aware the only thing in them is her iPhone. Which i proceed to steal frequently and dispense of in appropriate waste disposal units.

I'd rather reach my hand down her cleavage, tbh. That's where she keeps all her exciting things :whistle:
 

AUTO XX

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I decided a few years ago that I wasn't going to tolerate stress in a romantic relationship.
There are a few things that precipitate stress more than others:
1. Marriage, doesn't work... period...
2. Kids, I personally don't ever want kids or the troubles that come with them.
3. Drama, if you are looking for it, you can easily spot the drama queens.
4. Financially co-existing, this one turns nasty pretty easily.
5. Clingy, kinda the same as drama, but if either of you is clingy it probably isn't gonna work out.
6. Incompatible intelligence, date your integer...

Once I decided what I didn't want it only took about a month to find what I was interested in.
This has been my longest relationship (over 2.5 years), I have NO stress, we enjoy one another any time we are together but can go for a week or more without wondering "is he/she mad at me?"
We are of the same mind on marriage, children, financial affairs could be an issue (she has more than I do and I don't want ANY of it) but we got that sorted when I told her that if I didn't pay (at least most of the time) we wouldn't go anywhere together.
She has hobbies that she loves and that makes her a complete person without my presence.
*edit* I have always believed that 2 people aren't two halves of a whole, instead two whole people make one another's lives even better.
Of course I'm leaving out a lot but you get the idea.
Life is great and there is NO reason it shouldn't be.


*She also loves lasers*
 
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