- Joined
- Aug 25, 2010
- Messages
- 533
- Points
- 63
With immense pleasure here I am again among you, who have been, and still are, my second family.
I do not want to annoy you absolutely with all that I have suffered and that I am still undergoing,
but I will try to be with you again as much as possible, as long as I am allowed.
For the moment I am what can be defined as an half man, quartered, raped, amputated, a body where
all sorts of experiments have been carried out on top of it.
I met the same fate that my grandmother, my dad and my mom did.
We see that it was destiny.
I can't feed myself again in a normal way, and in the meanwhile I have lost about 30 kg.
I no longer recognize myself in the mirror, I no longer recognize my body or my soul.
Now I'm in the middle of an important move, the first and I suppose the last of my life.
I'm leaving a 115 square meter house that belonged to mine, where I lived there for 54 years, since 1967.
Too big for me, especially for the amount of memories it carries inside.
Rummaging and emptying among the almost never opened drawers and practically unexplored corners
for years, I found the most unthinkable and extravagant things, from the first milk teeth to the first
wisdom tooth extracted, from the first haircut made when I was only two years old to the photo of group
with my classmates in first grade, from the cork of sparkling wine kept on the occasion of my first day at
school to the photo of my first communion, dressed in a kind of long cream-colored toga with golden
inserts.
My mother kept everything, she was an old-fashioned woman, she never throws anything away.
She was a child of the war, where she suffered all sorts of deprivations.
Seeing that stuff my heart squeezed as if it were pressed into a vice, a lump in my throat that no longer
wanted to go up or down.
So I looked into the mirror and asked myself: why the fuck was I brought into this world?
Only to make this terrible end? It was worth it?
I have placed on the plates of a virtual scale the joys on one side and the pains on the other: inevitably
the scale has bent all over on the side of the pains, and the pointer has gone to the full scale.
Maybe I'm only a blasphemous guy, that not fully appreciate the gifts of the life, and maybe this is the
divine punishment I deserve.
I can't know, and I will not know until I finally leave this world populated by incarnated demons, imbued
only with evils and sufferings.
I found 10 km from here a delightful attic of 67 square meters, with a balcony of 18 square meters
overlooking a beautiful park.
Each room overlooks the balcony, so light and ventilation will never stain me.
I have a view to the West, where the sun sets, and I can see in the distance the beautiful Euganean Hills,
where as a child I used to go with my parents to have delicious picnics outdoors, in total carefree.
I also have several square meters of hidden surface under the attic used as a warehouse and a nice
garage just built of 18 square meters.
The neighborhood is quiet, well inhabited, and very close to the main hamlet square.
I would say that I have found the ideal place to die in peace.
As an internet connection I will only have a 200 MB: unfortunately the optical fiber is not yet present
in the district, I will have to settle for it.
In the meantime I also experienced a very unpleasant story where I saw my house being completely
turned upside down by the police that I had called to regulate my position about very old and
not-working rusty weapons inherited from my parents.
These pieces of shit instead of helping me in the regularization have claimed to see my whole house,
and so they have found several tens of kg of fireworks, explosive powders, machinery for the
construction of rockets and pyrotechnic mixtures of various types.
As of the result of this action I saw the garden in front of my house filled with police, forensics and
bomb squad trucks.
Every corner of my house was carefully photographated and filmed.
They also revoked my gun license, they confiscated my whole collection of weapons so dear to my
mother, all the machinery, the powders, the rockets, and not happy enough, they confiscated my very
expensive computer workstation, a 250 TB Synology server, and my mobile phone.
I was treated like a very dangerous criminal, I spent three months completely isolated from the rest of
the world, without having any more means of support.
Isolated and sick, I even went hungry, because the ongoing Covid issue had further worsened my
already very serious situation.
I had a quantifiable damage of $ 30,000 and a criminal complaint against me.
Knowing the biblical times of the Italian judiciary, I will see my expensive machinery again, perhaps
damaged and old enough to be almost completely unusable in a couple of years.
Here are the results of trusting Italian justice: the real criminals always get away with it, honest citizens
always take a cock it in that place.
However, I sincerely thank the people who have continued to send me their small contribution via
Paypal throughout my absence: they are pennies that have really helped me a lot.
As an ancient Chinese proverb says, "Even dust, if accumulated, can become a mountain!".
With sincere affection for all of you, I will carry you forever in my heart.
Richard.
I do not want to annoy you absolutely with all that I have suffered and that I am still undergoing,
but I will try to be with you again as much as possible, as long as I am allowed.
For the moment I am what can be defined as an half man, quartered, raped, amputated, a body where
all sorts of experiments have been carried out on top of it.
I met the same fate that my grandmother, my dad and my mom did.
We see that it was destiny.
I can't feed myself again in a normal way, and in the meanwhile I have lost about 30 kg.
I no longer recognize myself in the mirror, I no longer recognize my body or my soul.
Now I'm in the middle of an important move, the first and I suppose the last of my life.
I'm leaving a 115 square meter house that belonged to mine, where I lived there for 54 years, since 1967.
Too big for me, especially for the amount of memories it carries inside.
Rummaging and emptying among the almost never opened drawers and practically unexplored corners
for years, I found the most unthinkable and extravagant things, from the first milk teeth to the first
wisdom tooth extracted, from the first haircut made when I was only two years old to the photo of group
with my classmates in first grade, from the cork of sparkling wine kept on the occasion of my first day at
school to the photo of my first communion, dressed in a kind of long cream-colored toga with golden
inserts.
My mother kept everything, she was an old-fashioned woman, she never throws anything away.
She was a child of the war, where she suffered all sorts of deprivations.
Seeing that stuff my heart squeezed as if it were pressed into a vice, a lump in my throat that no longer
wanted to go up or down.
So I looked into the mirror and asked myself: why the fuck was I brought into this world?
Only to make this terrible end? It was worth it?
I have placed on the plates of a virtual scale the joys on one side and the pains on the other: inevitably
the scale has bent all over on the side of the pains, and the pointer has gone to the full scale.
Maybe I'm only a blasphemous guy, that not fully appreciate the gifts of the life, and maybe this is the
divine punishment I deserve.
I can't know, and I will not know until I finally leave this world populated by incarnated demons, imbued
only with evils and sufferings.
I found 10 km from here a delightful attic of 67 square meters, with a balcony of 18 square meters
overlooking a beautiful park.
Each room overlooks the balcony, so light and ventilation will never stain me.
I have a view to the West, where the sun sets, and I can see in the distance the beautiful Euganean Hills,
where as a child I used to go with my parents to have delicious picnics outdoors, in total carefree.
I also have several square meters of hidden surface under the attic used as a warehouse and a nice
garage just built of 18 square meters.
The neighborhood is quiet, well inhabited, and very close to the main hamlet square.
I would say that I have found the ideal place to die in peace.
As an internet connection I will only have a 200 MB: unfortunately the optical fiber is not yet present
in the district, I will have to settle for it.
In the meantime I also experienced a very unpleasant story where I saw my house being completely
turned upside down by the police that I had called to regulate my position about very old and
not-working rusty weapons inherited from my parents.
These pieces of shit instead of helping me in the regularization have claimed to see my whole house,
and so they have found several tens of kg of fireworks, explosive powders, machinery for the
construction of rockets and pyrotechnic mixtures of various types.
As of the result of this action I saw the garden in front of my house filled with police, forensics and
bomb squad trucks.
Every corner of my house was carefully photographated and filmed.
They also revoked my gun license, they confiscated my whole collection of weapons so dear to my
mother, all the machinery, the powders, the rockets, and not happy enough, they confiscated my very
expensive computer workstation, a 250 TB Synology server, and my mobile phone.
I was treated like a very dangerous criminal, I spent three months completely isolated from the rest of
the world, without having any more means of support.
Isolated and sick, I even went hungry, because the ongoing Covid issue had further worsened my
already very serious situation.
I had a quantifiable damage of $ 30,000 and a criminal complaint against me.
Knowing the biblical times of the Italian judiciary, I will see my expensive machinery again, perhaps
damaged and old enough to be almost completely unusable in a couple of years.
Here are the results of trusting Italian justice: the real criminals always get away with it, honest citizens
always take a cock it in that place.
However, I sincerely thank the people who have continued to send me their small contribution via
Paypal throughout my absence: they are pennies that have really helped me a lot.
As an ancient Chinese proverb says, "Even dust, if accumulated, can become a mountain!".
With sincere affection for all of you, I will carry you forever in my heart.
Richard.
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