Hahaha that's something i'd never expect someone of you caliber to ask, such a 'noobish' question. (I can't believe i said noobish) Tis what makes your question all the more comical.
I'll have to take a guided stab in the dark (punny) and say no to matches, but it would kill ballooons from a couple of inches.
wow. money wasting gimmick of the century! haha kinda cool though. Hopefully everything will eventually contain high power blue and green natural laser diodes so their price is reasonable...