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ArcticMyst Security by Avery

My wife left me

Joined
Apr 1, 2008
Messages
3,924
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My deepest sympathy for your loss. On the flip side though, women out number men by at least 2 to 1. They are like busses. Another one will show up every 15 min. or so. There is a mate for everyone out there. Just have the patience to wait for the right one to show up.
rob
 





Joined
Apr 23, 2011
Messages
22
Points
3
Sorry to hear about your hard time bro. I too related to depression through a crappy divorce and had an extremely hard time to deal. Try to keep yourself busy bro. I'll take time but it helps with keeping you sane.
 
Joined
Jan 4, 2011
Messages
110
Points
18
Always remember that you are your own individual. Although it seems impossible to make every decision for yourself after a relationship, you will regain a stronger self control after doing so.

Also remember to appreciate the small and beautiful things around you every day! When you think of past feelings try to instead think of tomorrow, and when you feel down try to smile!

There is much love around you and only a small portion of it is coming from your friends here at LPF.
 

Arayan

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Joined
Oct 26, 2009
Messages
1,746
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48
I'm living the same situation and I also have a baby of 5 year old, my only light!
 

boldar

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Joined
Jan 3, 2013
Messages
31
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I'm really sorry this happened. I can relate. I went through a very strange and messy divorce back in 2007. It was not easy and I didn't make it any easier by turning my emotions inwards. I let it be destructive and comsume me to send ripples of negativity through my life in both the social and professional spectrum.

Because I went through it and am very empathetic to the situation, I'm happy to offer some advice that I think will help.

1) People make decisions every day, sometimes they are small with little effect and sometimes they are big and have a profound effect. She made her decision and she is missing out on what could have been, that's unfortunate for her. You can make decisions too. You have that amazing power. So, think about it (but don't wollow in it) and make the decisions that will lead you in the direction you want to go. You can rebuild yourself from the ground up and make things better than ever! Look from an outside perspective as if you are seeing yourself as someone else ( in the 3rd person) and you want the person you are seeing to be happy. Take it a day at a time, and hour at a time, a minute at a time, but keep your feet moving... Even if it's just baby steps for now.

2) a) Surround yourself with good and positive people. I know it's hard to get out of the house right now, but try and go do fun things with friends as a bit of distraction and break from feeling alone and sad. b) If this is too much right now then I would recommend talking to a psychologist. c) If that isn't helping, then a psychiatrist isn't out of the question and I'm sure the psychologist could reccomend a good one. I'd only recommend meds as a last and very short-term resort. Only as a crutch to get through the hardest of times and then ditch them when you can walk on your own. Only go as far down a, b, c as you need to.

3) Remind yourself that your happiness is important and that you are worth the effort to get you back there. There are brighter skies ahead and look forward to seeing them, because you will someday. Keep your eyes on that prize!

It's now been about 7 years for me since I was back where you are. I'm now in a 5 year relationship and I have to say that I'm pretty damn happy these days, especially because I focus on how fortunate I am, instead of trying to point out the things that could be better. You will get through this minor setback!

Hang in there and keep your chin up!
 




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