Jokes thread!

[ped]

Google are to build the first self-driving cars with the only controls being an on/off button.
It might also be handy to include some way of telling them your intended destination.

 

[ARG]

Google are to build the first self-driving cars with the only controls being an on/off button.
It might also be handy to include some way of telling them your intended destination.

Also notice the headlights and tail lights are just decals?

 

[InfinitusEquitas]

It's probably just a very early version prototype.

 

[BShanahan14rulz]

As much as I like driving, this needs to happen. I'm tired of sitting in traffic for 2 hours of my day when I only live a few interstate exits down from my work... Oh, and the deaths from car crashes, but mostly traffic. If rush hour traffic doesn't make you lose faith in human intelligence, you may just be a saint.

 

[Zeebit]

That Fluke picture looks fake. The word "Futile" is much sharper and darker compared to the MΩ and its also misaligned. But hey, its a joke

 

[InfinitusEquitas]

That Fluke picture looks fake. The word "Futile" is much sharper and darker compared to the MΩ and its also misaligned. But hey, its a joke

Definitely fake, but it made me laugh

 

[InfinitusEquitas]

 

[paul1598419]

Two rural Texans were walking along the road. After a period of time had elapsed they came upon an old hound dog licking himself in the way dogs will do. The two Texans watched the dog for a while and then one said to the other, " Don't you wish you could do that?" to which the other Texan replied, " Yeah, but I'm afraid he'd bite me".

A young Texan boy ran away with his girlfriend and got married. The next day his father saw him slowly walking home with his head down and obviously disappointed. The father scolded his young son saying," Son, you just got married and here you are coming back home after leaving your new bride. This is totally unacceptable". " But Pa" the boy exclaimed, "you don't understand." The father said, " No, son, you took sacred vows and there is no reason for you to leave your new bride." But the boy persisted," But pa, you don't understand ". " Okay, son, what don't I understand ?' " Pa, she was a virgin ." The father stopped and thought for a moment and said, " Son, you did the right thing ". " If she ain't good enough for her own kin, she ain't good enough for us".

 

[InfinitusEquitas]

 

[Teej]

 

[InfinitusEquitas]

Any GOT fans here?

 

[paul1598419]

What do you get when you cross an agnostic, an insomniac and a dyslexic? Someone who lies awake nights wondering if there is a dog.

 

[InfinitusEquitas]

 

[NightExplorer96]

Ok these are really lame but here goes

1) Who do you tell a corny joke to?
Answer: A farmer

2) Want to hear a joke about a pizza?
Answer: Nevermind, it's too cheesy

3) What kind of bagel flies?
Answer: A plain bagel

4) What time do trees hate the most?
Answer: SepTEMBER

-Alex

 

[InfinitusEquitas]

 

[The Lightning Stalker]

New Diode

Very Long Long Open Can