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ArcticMyst Security by Avery

Event: High School/ Percent Completed: 100%






Joined
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Just decide to live the rest of your life with the assumption that ANY part of it may one day be explained to your child.

You get to decide what that child might hear.

:beer:

:crackup: Teej I frequently think you're living in a fantasy world, I suppose you think the same of me but let's avoid any spillover between threads. Most marriage ends in divorce and one parent frequently does not get to decide what that child might hear. Alex my advice to you and all young people is don't marry or have a child with the first woman you think you love (you will meet her in college), or the second one either, because you probably can't trust them, take a long time to be sure you found the right one or just don't marry or have children. I have seen it destroy people's lives forever. Don't even think of having children until or unless you are financially secure. Best of luck with your future and +rep for making it this far. Take your life where it leads you, opportunities only come along once, just watch where you step and watch your back, we live in interesting times.

Alan
 
Joined
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@Pi R Squared

Agreed! My plan right now is work over the summer to get a reliable first ride, then make sure I can manage paying off the car insurance along with gas etc...once I'm comfortable with that I'll move on to buying bigger things. Having a kid isn't something I'll be ready for in years :p

-Alex
 
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Joined
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I'm really happy this the username I picked this time so I think this one is a keeper! :)

A keeper?

iaKJYmF.png


... You spelled extraordinary wrong.
 

Teej

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:crackup: Teej I frequently think you're living in a fantasy world, I suppose you think the same of me but let's avoid any spillover between threads. Most marriage ends in divorce and one parent frequently does not get to decide what that child might hear. Alex my advice to you and all young people is don't marry or have a child with the first woman you think you love (you will meet her in college), or the second one either, because you probably can't trust them, take a long time to be sure you found the right one or just don't marry or have children. I have seen it destroy people's lives forever. Don't even think of having children until or unless you are financially secure. Best of luck with your future and +rep for making it this far. Take your life where it leads you, opportunities only come along once, just watch where you step and watch your back, we live in interesting times.

Alan

Sigh.

The point is not to have children right now, or not, etc...or if your ex-wife will bad mouth you (sorry?).



The POINT is that you should live your life as if your child will know what you did/didn't do.

Think about what you do in terms of how you'd FEEL, explaining it to your child.


In other words, lets say you have an opportunity to take advantage of a situation, but it was immoral, or, it was a great opportunity that required guts, etc.

Don't do something you would not want your kid to know about. (Private stuff like ***, unless it's really relevant, etc, is not what this is about...its about morality, right vs wrong)

If you're doing something that you would not want your hypothetical son to find out about...don't do it.

If you are not doing something you might later wish you did (Join the military, save that cat, whatever)...maybe you SHOULD do it, and so forth.

:wave:


(Its a hypothetical child...until, one day, perhaps it isn't)

So, if you don't want to have to one day explain why you cheated on mommy, don't cheat on mommy.

If you don't want to have to explain why you robbed that bank, don't rob the bank......

If she's hitting on you, but might be underage, and you don't want to later explain why you are a labeled *** offender...don't get involved...or at least get ID, etc...


...its a way of looking at the present through the eyes of the future. Young people tend to have an under developed sense of consequence, which leads to a distinct lack of that kind of awareness that there WILL be a future, and their present actions do impact what it might be like....and THAT'S why they are famous for doing dumb stuff they later regret.



IE: If you ASK them, sure there's a future, etc....no problem....BUT - They have another drink and then drive, they vandalize that place when they get drunk with their budz, they let that bachelor party get out of control and land up in jail...and so forth.



YOU might be on the 3rd wife and have your kids turned against you, etc...but not everyone is.

I married in school, (young), and am still married to the same chick almost 40 years later, with middle aged kids who I adore/see all the time/are not "turned against me", etc.


Yes, its a crap shoot, but, its often due to the same bad decision making most young people are simply prone too...if you do it right, it works...or at least CAN work.

Telling people not to try is not the answer.


Avoiding bone head decisions like knocking her up and "doing the right thing" started with the wrong choice ("Knocking her up").

Getting married because she didn't want to just keep dating forever...doesn't tend to being married forever.

Getting married for any reason other than not being able to bear being apart...is typically a mistake. "We've been dating a long time, so, we should probably...., my mom wants grandkids...if I wait any longer I won't be able to have them, I want to get married now because if I wait any longer I'll be too old to get someone new...and so forth are NOT good triggers for marriage.

:D


I got married young, typically a mistake. We were in school, and, neither wanted to get serious, so we broke up, but, it didn't work out....I waited a few years before starting a family, which helped a LOT...as its nice if the dad's at least shaving by the time he has kids.


:D
 
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