Hello! My name is Emil and I just signed up on this forum to post my short story here to see whether any of you have any insight to help me in my situation. Here's what has happened.
I own a 30mW red laser which has two beams that are supposed to be used for the ears to regenerate damaged hair cells. One night while being in a particularly philosophical mode after a night of some MDMA and weed I just started playing with these things in my ceiling (bad idea obviously since these drugs could hamper sensitivity...). My lasers disperse the light quite a bit at the distance I was looking at (approximately a 20-60 cm radius 1,5-3 meters), so there is no single spot of light where everything is gathered as with laser pointers. Rather, the lasers light up the room quite a bit with a lager illuminated surface. I found it rather interesting to look at the lasers and did so for what could have been like 5 minutes, I can't recall exactly. When I was done playing with them I looked at my phone and saw it was all green, which I understand is normal after looking at red light, but I was highly alarmed by this. My vision also became blurry for a short moment and soon I felt my eyes started burning with pain and I was sensitive to light. Completely panicked I went to the hospital right away. They checked everything about my eyes: retina, cornea, pressure, sight, tears etc all came back normal except that my tears didn't last quite as long as normal, indicating dry eyes. So they attributed my pain to dry eyes and said that my lasers did not cause any damage. Yet, the pain continued with dry eyes and a kind of "thick" feeling around the eye and sort of behind it, as though my muscles were swollen or the eyeball itself is in pain(?).
After exposure to a certain amount of daylight my eyes became swollen several times and I went to the hospital to recheck everything and they continually assured me that I had nothing to worry about. What the heck? I also asked my "laser doctor" and he assured me that the lasers could not damage my eyes the was I used them. So why the intense reaction? Are they just "over strained", and what exactly has been over strained? Muscles? Some structures of the eye? Which ones? My vision is just as it was before, no change there, but my eyes are drier and tolerate less light... I'm now two weeks into this, symptoms go up and down but still no major improvements, although it's better than the first week.
I should add that it was a white, painted surface (not entirely flat and glossy). What I'm wondering is how much light reflected back into my eyes? I read somewhere about 10% on white, glossier surfaces, and given the 5mW-rule I would then be close to the dangerzone. But does it matter that my lasers disperse the light, making every "spot" I focus on much weaker than 30mW... It should matter, right?
My friend whom I was with this night thinks it could be psychological. That for whatever reason my unconscious is now distracting me with pain in order not to deal with uncomfortable emotions and to go live my life. I doubt it, since I've experienced swelling and gather that's a reaction to structural damage rather than a psychological manifestation (having read some psycho-forums). Although some people on these forums did in fact insist that they had symptoms of swelling with their psychosomatic stuff, it seemed to be less common and perhaps untrue with the professional opinion.
What I really wonder is what is causing my symptoms; if I will always be light sensitive and having pain from dry eyes from now on or if it could be a passing symptom of some over strain. Can the doctors not see all damage done to the eye? Cornea and retina is still intact, but could the eye have been damaged still, or just made more sensitive? Permanently? Also, if it's a case of over strain, what has been over strained? Muscles? Some structure in the eye?
Any knowledgeable fellow here that can shed light (though not too strong
on this messy situation I'm in is very welcome to post. Thanks
Also any ideas on how to "conduct" myself in a world of light from now on. Use shades in daylight or try to adapt the eye to light again?
(Btw I am calling the hospital tomorrow for more information from them.)
/ Emil
I own a 30mW red laser which has two beams that are supposed to be used for the ears to regenerate damaged hair cells. One night while being in a particularly philosophical mode after a night of some MDMA and weed I just started playing with these things in my ceiling (bad idea obviously since these drugs could hamper sensitivity...). My lasers disperse the light quite a bit at the distance I was looking at (approximately a 20-60 cm radius 1,5-3 meters), so there is no single spot of light where everything is gathered as with laser pointers. Rather, the lasers light up the room quite a bit with a lager illuminated surface. I found it rather interesting to look at the lasers and did so for what could have been like 5 minutes, I can't recall exactly. When I was done playing with them I looked at my phone and saw it was all green, which I understand is normal after looking at red light, but I was highly alarmed by this. My vision also became blurry for a short moment and soon I felt my eyes started burning with pain and I was sensitive to light. Completely panicked I went to the hospital right away. They checked everything about my eyes: retina, cornea, pressure, sight, tears etc all came back normal except that my tears didn't last quite as long as normal, indicating dry eyes. So they attributed my pain to dry eyes and said that my lasers did not cause any damage. Yet, the pain continued with dry eyes and a kind of "thick" feeling around the eye and sort of behind it, as though my muscles were swollen or the eyeball itself is in pain(?).
After exposure to a certain amount of daylight my eyes became swollen several times and I went to the hospital to recheck everything and they continually assured me that I had nothing to worry about. What the heck? I also asked my "laser doctor" and he assured me that the lasers could not damage my eyes the was I used them. So why the intense reaction? Are they just "over strained", and what exactly has been over strained? Muscles? Some structures of the eye? Which ones? My vision is just as it was before, no change there, but my eyes are drier and tolerate less light... I'm now two weeks into this, symptoms go up and down but still no major improvements, although it's better than the first week.
I should add that it was a white, painted surface (not entirely flat and glossy). What I'm wondering is how much light reflected back into my eyes? I read somewhere about 10% on white, glossier surfaces, and given the 5mW-rule I would then be close to the dangerzone. But does it matter that my lasers disperse the light, making every "spot" I focus on much weaker than 30mW... It should matter, right?
My friend whom I was with this night thinks it could be psychological. That for whatever reason my unconscious is now distracting me with pain in order not to deal with uncomfortable emotions and to go live my life. I doubt it, since I've experienced swelling and gather that's a reaction to structural damage rather than a psychological manifestation (having read some psycho-forums). Although some people on these forums did in fact insist that they had symptoms of swelling with their psychosomatic stuff, it seemed to be less common and perhaps untrue with the professional opinion.
What I really wonder is what is causing my symptoms; if I will always be light sensitive and having pain from dry eyes from now on or if it could be a passing symptom of some over strain. Can the doctors not see all damage done to the eye? Cornea and retina is still intact, but could the eye have been damaged still, or just made more sensitive? Permanently? Also, if it's a case of over strain, what has been over strained? Muscles? Some structure in the eye?
Any knowledgeable fellow here that can shed light (though not too strong
on this messy situation I'm in is very welcome to post. Thanks Also any ideas on how to "conduct" myself in a world of light from now on. Use shades in daylight or try to adapt the eye to light again?
(Btw I am calling the hospital tomorrow for more information from them.)
/ Emil
